I work in Montpelier, obviously. I live in Burlington, also obviously.
For most people I think that would mean that they have a nice balance of distance and familiarity that they don't feel that nostalgia, that sense of youth and home-ness, and stagnation surrounded by growth. I do though.
Not all the time, but it comes in waves, this sense of this is my hometown.
I don't live in Montpelier, so I don't feel like this is my home. But I still feel a strong sense of 'I belong here, I was made here, parts of me live here, and parts of this town live in me.'
When I walk downtown on a really perfect day. When I drive through side streets, avoiding traffic. When I see people I've made dozens of sandwiches for, or people who've worked at local restaurants for decades. When I think about the fact that I graduated from the same high school that I run by. I just get this overwhelming sense of this is part of me.
Sometimes it's just Montpelier. It's just where I work. It's just where my parents live.
Sometimes it hits me that I'm growing, I'm changing, my life is 3200% different than the last time I lived here. But I still know the best place to get coffee. I still know which parking lots will be dead at lunchtime. I still love Montpelier traditions. I still have this piece of me that lives in these places, and these people that make Montpelier.
I think some of this nostalgia comes from hitting that one year mark of living in Burlington.
See, I'm finally at a point where I don't feel like an outsider any more.
Burlington still doesn't feel like home.
It feels like where I live.
But Montpelier doesn't feel like home right now either.
It feels like where I am from.
I love them both, really. But it's so weird to feel your heart ricochet between the two, and feel...suspended, waiting to settle in to another home.
I'm currently studying at UT Austin, and I'm totally torn as to what feels like "home"! I love Houston, because I've lived there for a long time, but I know Austin is only a teporary "home". I'm also waiting!
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