Intentional, Content, Grateful & Present

This summer (yes, many months and many more degrees ago) I started working on a part of me that I abandoned quite thoroughly many years ago.

By some miracle or another I stumbled upon Lara Casey (whom I've written about before) and I started reading about her work with Southern Weddings Magazine, and her personal brand, and Making What Matters Happen. Maybe most importantly in each of these parts of her life, is her faith.

Reading Lara lead to reading others, to following others on Instagram, to hearing about other people's journeys. Now, I'm not dumb enough to think that you all would love hear about the time I've had over the last six months or so, working out who I am, and where I stand in this world, but I will say this, Lara's Powersheets, and her dedication to her faith, and sharing it with other's has shaped the way that I have dived into this last semester.

I started off August by working on intention, in my life, my actions, my thoughts.
I plowed through October while trying to be content in where I am, and what I have.
I stumbled through November attempting to be grateful, for the struggle, for learning and growing.
Here I am in December, doing my best to be present, in where I am, who I am, and this life I've got.

While each month has been something new, and something that changes me, that forces me to grow, each month has also been a struggle. In their own right, each month of this semester has brought challenges - as I knew they would. But if I am being perfectly honest, those challenges are easier with a little bit (and a growing amount at that) of faith. It is easier to take on the criticism, the hatred, the stress, when you feel like there is someone or something that has your back - like even when you feel completely and utterly alone, you aren't.

Now, I spent a lot of years cringing at the idea of working on my faith. I spent a lot of years renouncing my religion, and avoiding any thought that I may have really abandoned something worth...believing in. So I will be the first to say, this is not for everyone. This is not easy. This is harder - for sure - when you go to a liberal, modern, diverse school. This is harder when you've spent years denying it.

This is not easy.

This is not a walk that everyone feels like taking.

And I am really okay with that. I am okay with not flooding my twitter, or Instagram, or Facebook, with quotes and verses - with letting this be a private journey. I am okay with knowing that it makes plenty of people a little squeamish, because that was me. Because, to some degree, that is still me.

But I think, I'm at a point where I am also okay with talking about the fact that I am working on my faith, and where God is in my life.

Because, and here's the kicker, if other people hadn't been okay with that - if other people hadn't been willing to share their stories with strangers - I would have never taken the first step down this road.