Try Back Later

Remember when I said we would talk more about why I chose my platform and what that life is like? Right. About that. Well, like I've noticed before, and like I imagine I'll continue to notice - it is so much harder to talk about the hard parts, when you're in the hard parts.

I think I've said that before, that the time to talk about what it means to struggle with good mental health isn't when it's hard - it's when it's not.

Well, sometimes you gotta do both.

I'm one of those walking examples of everything looks awesome, but some days are very hard. And sometimes you just cry at that dumb Dan & Shay song, and really you only want to eat chips and guac, and you have to be very very nice to yourself because occasionally your brain is unkind. Lots of no Rylee, you're not fat, going on in these parts over the last few days. Hashtag true life. 

Lucky me though, because I'm also a walking example of you can live through this. 

You know what I mean, right? It's like I could sit here and probably write for three hours on how things have been so much harder in the last two weeks. But I'm just as able to talk about how I know there is another side to this. I know what life looks like when it's not this shade of difficult.

I don't have a lot to say right now, because I don't want to sit here for three hours and detail the crappy feelings and kinda how the loneliness that has been hanging out in my back pocket is the size of Harambe. Also mostly because I don't want to sit around and talk about it right now.

Later, when it's easier again.

But here's the point: we talk about it anyways.  

Because it happens, it is real, and it is not my whole identity. We talk about it because it matters. We talk about it because someone else is listening. We talk about it to remind ourselves that there are better days. We talk about it, and we move through it. And we keep pushing for another tomorrow.

...When there may or may not be an actual weekly update. Who knows. 

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